Humorist With A Love For Dogs Gifts

"Good boy."

Dog Hunting Trophies.

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

"He's no hat and all corgis."

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

'I'd like to return this, please.'

Pet psychic -- yup, she's for real.

Dog fetching clown shoes.

"Now turn your head and bark."

"Ugh—someone in the group chat must have seen a squirrel."

"Pssst. Fake poop."

"Yeah well, now that we're married, he's not making any effort: he hasn't been to a grooming appointment in months!"

"I did, boss, I swear, I buried him myself."

"Sometimes Bob wags when he's happy—but these days, it usually means he just tooted."

Dogs texting each other emojis

"I need a hip replacement but I believe they're looking at a dog replacement."

"There are those who say I'm a throwback to Monet."

'My dad must like you, or he would have charged by now.'

'Toilet paper, Lassie! Fetch toilet paper! Stupid mutt!'

'Trouble is, he rubbed my nose in it'

"Look, Mommy. Puppy already knows a trick! What should we call him?" "How about 'Scooter.'"

'What makes you say I spoil the cat?'

Woman Walking a Trojan Horse

Labradoodle/Labradon't-le

Select a song: Another Dog Barking. Lots of Other Dogs Barking. Howling. Siren. Doorbell. Dog Karaoke.

"I think that I shall never see a tree on which I wouldn't pee."

A sausage dog shrinking after toileting

Dog leaving operating theatre in a hurry with a bone in his mouth

Strikeout Dog

'While you're 'fixing' my private parts, could you give me a loaner pair?'

'I'm afraid you're just going to have to accept that dogs just don't like you.'

Employees Must Lick Themselves Before Returning to Work.

"No, honest, I just sat on a squeaky toy."

"You're the first dog I've introduced to my parents. I know they're gonna love you."

"Gas was passed, you get the blame, that's the system."