Humor In Gastronomy Gifts

'A fly in your soup, eh? -- Call me if it gets any worse.'

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

"States of tofu"

Too Many Lawyers Spoil the Broth

"War is hell and so is this soup."

Lesser known greek gods,

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

"I feel like we are the polyester of dairy products."

MUSHROOM MASACRE.

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

How to Deal With Leftover Turkey

Garlic Free Zone.

'I think it's more than a coincidence that I discover fire, and my wife discovers burnt food on the same day.'

"I'll have the spaghetti, does that come on toast?"

"Charles didn't like tofu."

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

'Muriel's philosophy is that what happens in the kitchen, stays in the kitchen.'

Lockdown casserole

"Can you turn these mashed potatoes into french fries?"

"The salad should be delicious. We ordered it with lots of extra bacon bits."

"Waiter, there's a hare in my salad!"

Deliboys

Cat eats date.

'It's labour-saving because with this you'll be able to burn my meals much faster!'

"Dare I ask for mustard?"

"My guess it's guacamole."

'I take it that the birthday cake is for this old trout you just served me?'

'Look, I know it's artificial orange, but you're sick, I say, sick.'

Where 'Turkey Bacon" Comes From