Household Hierarchy Advocate Pillows

"This happens everytime someone asks to speak to the head of the household."

"The kids love it, and it's saved my marriage."

"Biff's old money, Angelo is new money and Boris is funny money."

"I'm just going to ring the doorbell so I have a chance of a spot in the bed."

"Back when I was your age the only way to get a promotion was kissing butt."

"The boss can see you now."

"Now the geeks hold all the power. They're the ones who know how to forge a parent's e-signature."

"It looks like we're reorganizing again."

Bureaucrats held up by the workers.

'It may not be your feng shui, but it's my feng shui.'

Separation Anxiety

Mr. Briggs' Pleasures of Housekeeping, part 1

"Sorry, Pete, but Bill is now my 'go-to' guy. Until further notice, you're my 'anybody-but' guy."

"I like to keep things simple."

You are here.

"I'm going to need your room cleaned by end-of-day."

"All our staff are equal, but the ones with qualifications are more equal than others."

"It means, Thank Goodness I'm Boss."

'Other than no dognip or an indoor bathroom, I enjoy being a dog.'

"I know you're the quote, 'company's envelope orderer', but change the acronym."

Magic Carpet Cleaning

"Everybody in the whole damn household is alpha."

Age 42: Still stuck at the children's table.

Hunter-Gatherer, Agriculture, Services, Tech. . . Job-Hunter-Gatherer.

'It's says here that you are 'kind to inferiors'. I'm surprised to learn that there are any...'

"Look at you—folding the laundry two days before couples therapy."

Conglomerates

Design and Display company's executives have their titles displayed on their foreheads.

Woman is on computer searching a website for lost socks.

Musical washing

"You're free to range. Just stay away from that Tiffany—she's trouble."