Household Harmony Lover Pillows

Mr. Briggs' Pleasures of Housekeeping, part 1

Musical Accompaniment to Household Chores.

'Davinia! Your Feng Shui person's here.'

"Well, your feng shui isn't my feng shui."

Separation Anxiety

"I'm going to be vacuuming, if you want to go into the farthest room and start asking me questions."

'Not bad. Already 17 minutes into Saturday morning before I receive my first ultimatum.'

"Relax, grandpa. The quarterback is taking a knee to run out the clock."

"I wish you'd get more in touch with your masculine side, Robert"

A woman's work is never done!

'Other than no dognip or an indoor bathroom, I enjoy being a dog.'

"Despite my best efforts, you're still the man and I'm still the woman."

"I love spending time together as a family. It brings us together. It makes us stronger. It helps us understand each other."

"I know it's 3 a.m. but don't you think this is a good time to discuss spending the holidays with my mother."

"Everybody in the whole damn household is alpha."

The Cricket on the Hearth - Title-page to the first edition

"It's your turn to throw out the dishes."

Looks like I do dishes again.

Magic Carpet Cleaning

'You're always taking the fun out of everything!'

'My Graham is very house-proud.'

Blanket Pull

'4 Jello desserts - and, for the love of God, please make them all the same color.'

'No madam, the seat does not keep falling down, to the annoyance of male users, would you like one that does?'

"Roommates"

"You go right on snoring, doesn’t bother me one bit. Your snores are beautiful, do you know that? I love snoring…not like some people."

Theirs and Theirs

"Honey, please! I can’t concentrate with you in there being married to me!"

"I apologize for the mess."

'Wait, put that back where it was. Let's see how the scratching post looks in this corner.'

My mum is very houseproud.

"Harold, have you reaped huge gains that you have not told me about?"

Plumbing Co - we repair what your husband fixed.

This is Bad Feng Shui!