Household Harmony Enthusiast Pillows

"How do I get my husband to pick up after himself?"

"Sorry, but my mum doesn't want me to invite friends over: She's kind of ashamed we live in a pigsty..."

Separation Anxiety

"I'm going to be vacuuming, if you want to go into the farthest room and start asking me questions."

Mr. Briggs' Pleasures of Housekeeping, part 1

"I wish you'd get more in touch with your masculine side, Robert"

'Other than no dognip or an indoor bathroom, I enjoy being a dog.'

"Despite my best efforts, you're still the man and I'm still the woman."

"I know it's 3 a.m. but don't you think this is a good time to discuss spending the holidays with my mother."

"Everybody in the whole damn household is alpha."

Magic Carpet Cleaning

"Painted like this, finding furniture to match at least one colour should be simple!"

'You're always taking the fun out of everything!'

"It's your turn to throw out the dishes."

Looks like I do dishes again.

The Cricket on the Hearth - Title-page to the first edition

Blanket Pull

'No madam, the seat does not keep falling down, to the annoyance of male users, would you like one that does?'

"Harold, have you reaped huge gains that you have not told me about?"

Theirs and Theirs

Plumbing Co - we repair what your husband fixed.

'That's it? The facts of life? Mom washes the dishes and you dry them?'

Woman is on computer searching a website for lost socks.

Musical washing

'If your mom's not happy then nobody's happy, right dad.'

'Relax, Silly. He's not here for you.'

'How about we get this closet organizer as a together gift?'

'Herbert just loves to help with the dishes.'

"A Therapist didn't save my marriage. A plumber and a second bathroom saved my marriage!"

"What are you complaining about? When I met you, you were living in a one-room apartment."

"The secret to a good marriage son is to do most of the spring cleaning..."

Hymns and Her

'I guess you have another excuse for not taking out the garbage.'

"It's not so much spring cleaning as it is 'My mom is visiting for Mother's Day' cleaning."

"That's fine. I've learned to enjoy TV with no sound when we're at odds."