Hotel Adventurous Gifts

" ....you didn't say wanted one that worked."

Carefree luggage.

Airlines

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

'The fun begins when we go through airport security.'

A tourist inadvertently destroying the place he is visiting

"I always check 2 bags, but one's just a sacrifice to the luggage gods."

"This bag is carry-on, and this one is kick-drop-throw-and-pile-on."

Wine enthusiast tries to make his way to Cork.

Kardiff.

'We don't know which gate flight 311 to Denver is boarding. These are the menus.'

'Nobody ever before had took much notice of Granny's homemade flour-sack bloomers.'

"Excuse me, I think you'll find I've reserved that luggage rack space ..."

"Sorry for the wait. Have you guys been here long?"

Welsh airport arrivals.

"Now boarding group 50 and up."

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

The Professor was a brilliant botanist but a hopeless photographer.

Airport

Safari.

"Hey guys - wrote a new song! It's called 'I suggested Paris.' And a' one, two three..."

"Don't worry. If we're too late, we can always catch the secondary screening."

Excess Baggage: Why can't airports provide a decent place for paying customers to catch forty winks?

"Your driver will arrive in 4...9...17 minutes after three accidental loops around the airport."

A tourist struggling with loads of luggage

I'm getting old, I spotted a couple of brown hairs among the punk.

"I'd pack light if it wasn't for the shoes."

"Welcome to the French Quarter!"

'As a matter-of-fact I didn't pack my own bags...Well,well, well...Speak of the devil!'

Bed and Breakfast

"His name? It's 'Reggie the Drug-Sniffing Dog.'"

A pocket of pygmies - "Have you anything to declare sir?"

"Could you have a quick look at my molar? I can't afford a dental x-ray."

Arrivals, departures & limbo.