Hot Water Skeptics Gifts

"I told you not to give them a bath in hot water!"

"(Huff) Here's (huff) your (huff) tea (huff... huff... huff... huff...)" "I will almost certainly regret asking you this, but what on earth are you doing, you cretin?" "All (huff) across America, (huff) office workers are ditching (huff) their desks and walking (huff) on treadmills while they work." "Can I get some water?" "Coming right up." "Good thing I wore my tripping shoes."

"I'm addicted to water."

"He's still bitter that bottled water ruined his reign as king of the water cooler."

'Ptuwah! This is tap water!'

'...And you wanted to hibernate when we could be playing beach volleyball!'

"I'll get that. First go get me a glass of warm water."

"Lets stop arguing about the pool. We'll divide it in half and stay on our half."

"We don't kiss butt around here, but we sure bootlick the bottom line."

"A dry heat - no problem. But this humidity."

Crisp New England Air.

Dance of the Inconsistent Water Temperature

'The truth is, it's really the heat, not the humidity.'

''Earn our bread by the sweat of our brow'? -- is that sanitary?'

'If I'm not mistaken, Mayfield is a sewage treatment plant.'

'Remember, it's not the heat, it's the humidity.'

Lemonade Cleanse - $20 a glass.

'She hates getting her feet wet.'

"So what if we don't have a computer...at least we have a website."

'We don't want any ugly wind farms spoiling the natural beauty round here!'

"Where's all that clean coal we hear about?"

"At first I thought it was cool that my mom kept wanting me to test her phone to see if it was waterproof. Now I know it was just a way to get me to take showers."

"Hello, Ministry of Propaganda..."

"Good afternoon sir. Would you like to switch your energy supplier to one that's equally artificially expensive. . . ?"

Keystone Cop

'At last! An energy bill we can understand.'