Horsemanship Humorist Gifts

"In days gone by the village blacksmith was often called upon to shoo horses."

Sympathetic nursing will work wonders

For speedy operation and ease of control get a pony.

'Humans seem to be so weight-conscious: My rider weighs himself before each race...'

Moo! OOM!

Mr Tom Noddy's First Day With the Hounds Pt. 4

'Where's my horse?'

'This is what Jack and me have managed to create so far...all you have to do is add your poop to the top and we have a field record!'

It is a good idea to start by learning how to mount your pony.

The Enemy

Grass: We lost some good men today!

Inappropriate horse whispering.

"You can achieve anything if you put you mind to it."

'I know you like your stallions tall Mary, but a clydesdale?'

Never clip him yourself unless you are an expert.

Before her first dressage competition, Kate suffered from Pre-Traumatic Stress.

Show Jumping Tantrums

Lawyers Ridin' The Range: 'Happy trials to you, until we meet again!'

'Think Basics.'

A Few Common Ailments

"I'd love to help but at the moment I'm saddled with this enormous mortgage."

'This is one of those 'shovel ready' jobs you hear about.'

Polo pony

The Cud Food Guide

'I'm not taking any chances with the water jump this year.'

Horse accidents

'He thinks he's so hot but, personally, I'd rather be artificially inseminated.'

"Boy, this is the life: For a bit of riding every day, we get fed, pampered and groomed..."

Journalist Interviewing a Fallen Rider.

"I dumped my stable companion, he was seeing another pony!"

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Racing - No. II - IV

"Yes, you show signs of depression, but there may be a simple explanation: does your cowboy listen to a lot of country music?"

"Hey, this is a marathon, not a sprint."

Stop! Mad cows are forbidden to cross the border!

Oat Cuisine in Horse's Nosebag