Horror Writers Gifts

Stephen King

'Medical school's been more challenging since the cadavers turned into zombies.'

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Edgar Allen Poe

Transylvanian backpackers.

"...and the humans turned Neville into 80,000 toothpicks..."

"You do realize I'm going to have to bill you for ten?"

1847 - Bram Stoker, creator of Dracula was born in Dublin.

Silence of the Chickens...

One vampire tricks another behind a mirror.

"Oh, mournful and terrible engine of horror and crime—of agony and of death, not asparagus again!"

You're dead to me, Marsha. And that's just the way I like it."

"Yeah, I'm moonlighting. It's a living."

'So, what's for dinner ...a séance?'

Euripides: 'If we could be twice young and twice old, we could correct all our mistakes.'

Dr. Frankenstein creates his newest monster, Frankenmime.

'I know how much you like holding hands, so I brought you a box of them..'

'I'd like my £2.50 back'

"This makes Pamplona seem like child's play."

Arthur Schopenhauer

'This financial report is frightening. Who wrote it, Stephen King?"

Henrik Ibsen,

Frankenstein's Monster's PC.

Open House of Horrors

"I'd like to buy a BOWEL."

Litterary Dogs.

'Transylvania's most famous Optometrist 'Count Mracula'.'

"Are you looking for metric or imperial sized neck bolts?"

The Quack Quack Diaries: Quack Quack's Poetic Justice

We have a problem with your research. We're Encyclopedia Britannica and you're Wikipedia.

Learn to Be a Critic In The Privacy Of Your Own Home With The Apex Correspondence School Of Criticism!

"The guide book sys it's the best B.&B. in the Carpathians."

"Johnson, you're new here, right? Mind if I pick your brain?"

''Rumplestiltskin' sounds like an ALIAS to me!'

Zombie Problems