Horror Comedy Fans Gifts

A vampire preferring to use a napkin when sucking blood.

Monster game shows.

Fangs ain't what they use to be.

'Medical school's been more challenging since the cadavers turned into zombies.'

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

Transylvanian backpackers.

"Oh my gosh, honey! Look out!"

"You do realize I'm going to have to bill you for ten?"

"...and the humans turned Neville into 80,000 toothpicks..."

Silence of the Chickens...

"That'll be five bucks."

'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'

"Cat World Domination Day June 24th"

"It's such a beautiful day. Why don't we go out and get someone to eat?"

Two fishermen land on stumps. Man says to other, 'Is that enough structure for ya?!'

'So, what's for dinner ...a séance?'

'We were thinking of naming him after his daddy, but I don't really like the name, Old slap head.'

"We have plenty of time to catch the ark."

"Alexa, play Thriller by Michael Jackson."

'I was told you two have a love-hate relationship. Care to elaborate on that?'

"He says he's sure this isn't Wildwood. Did you put batteries in the GPS?"

"Do you live nearby by any chance? I hate to eat in public."

Frankenstein's Monster's PC.

"Are you looking for metric or imperial sized neck bolts?"

Standard & Poor

The Scarecrow Gets A Brain From Igor

Open House of Horrors

"You want to know why I drink?. . . I drink to forget!"

"Friends have been scribbling on my cast."

Technique #54 airlines are adopting for handling excessive carry on luggage.

'I'd also like to welcome Henderson here, who joins us through Equal Opportunities for the undead.'

"The guide book sys it's the best B.&B. in the Carpathians."

'Is your cabbage diet working darling?'

"Those are the lyrics? How embarrassing—I've been singing it wrong this whole time."

Frank & Ernest. Signe Painted. Cosmetology Dept. That should be "cosmology"! Why do you always get those two confused? I always think the one about space should have an "et" in it.