Hopeful Healer Gifts

'I suppose you realise this means we'll lose our disability allowance.'

"If I make it into medical school it'll be as a cadaver!"

"I want you to put your faith in the miracle of modern medicine. By which I mean you should hope for a miracle."

Licensed Therapist

'Take two tootsie rolls and call me in the morning.'

Kid with 'Little Wellness Facilitator' kit

Little doctor.

"And that's when the therapist suggested… exposure therapy!"

'Off hand I'd say she needs re-stuffing.'

New Age Store.

'All of our Little Doctor medical kits are on sale. Since the Healthcare bill passed, sales of the kits have been poor.'

"You want a generic or a regular sugar pill?"

Proceed no further if chakras not aligned.

"Honey, why don’t you tell Tony and Karen about your microdosing-healing-group thingy or whatever the heck it is?"

Transcend Dental Medication: "Prepare to let go of the pain."

Junior Doctor.

Shaman reads magazine entitled 'Witch Doctor'.

A man sews broken hearts back together.

The New Age Dentist.

'Let me handle this. I'm an orthopedic specialist.'

'He's the star of a new medical series.'

"Preparing for another day nursing?"

Little girl playing childrens hospital

'When I grow up I'm going to be a doctor. If science has left anything uncured.'

'I'm giving you a referral to Bobby Smith down the street.'

'Did you find someone to practice your first aid on, dear?'

'He touched you and you can walk again? I just got an illegible prescription.'

Medical school graduation gowns.

'I don't know what happened! All I did was say I went into medicine for the money!'

Fakir Shrink.

"My super-vision sees...someone yelling at his elders...Cousin Cecilia sneaking out her window...someone making a spinach burrito... No! I must stay focused...and find the evil villain mal de ojo!"

Medical Student

"And if Ooh, Eeh, Ooh Ah Ah doesn't work, we'll try Walla Walla Bing Bang."

Connect This, Woo-Woos

'Let's play alternative health provider.'