Homework Excuse Inventors Pillows

'I had my homework all finished, and members of a vast right-wing conspiracy broke into the house and took it.'

"Pfff, eating homework is nothing! My mum eats the clothes off the clothes line..."

"I have to rest. The 'check engine' light on my activity tracker just came on."

"He's declared it an area of natural beauty"

"Yes, I was using my mobile whilst driving... I was calling the police to tell them I was chasing a gang of bank robbers!"

'My arms are getting shorter.'

Student to math teacher: 'My dog ate my homework and got arithmetics.'

"We'd invite you to our place in the country but we're having it torched."

Pets are not only good companions, they're good excuses.

'I promoted Wetherby because he always comes up with better excuses.'

"A catfish ate my homework."

'The dog ate the flash drive with my homework on it...but I hope to get it back real soon!'

"I didn't feel any 'earthquake'."

"I dictated my essay to my parrot. Unfortunately, my cat then ate my homework."

'I tried to do my term paper, but the video store doesn't have ANYTHING about the Spanish-American War!'

'An essay on what I did last summer? -- I was hoping to let all that stuff blow over.'

'What about you, Billy? Did some deranged animal burst in during recess and devour your homework too?'

'It's worse than that -- my little brother ate my homework.'

'The dog ate my gnome-work.'

'Jogging's too dangerous for me. I tried it once, and I rear-ended a mailman.'

'We're worried about you. Your teacher called and said you're actually handing in your homework instead of eating it.'

'I'm very creative and creative people are not afraid to fail.'

Well, would you believe the cloud ate my homework?

"...but if it's a business trip why are you taking your fly pole?"

Kid about report card: 'I had technical problems.'

'He's OK now, but don't let him eat anymore homework.'

"Sharp pencils, clean paper, good light, comfortable chair, hot coffee, warm room... ready to work... perhaps the room is too warm..."

Reasons to avoid training no.236 - A leaf on the path.

"Sorry, I can't make it tonight - I have too good a parking sport."

"Are you sure the Russians didn't hack my answers to make me look bad?"

'The dog kinda ate my homework. He deleted it off my hard drive.'

"I can't go job hunting. I don't have a permit."

'Is it my fault they didn't send me to obedience school?'

"My mother ate math homework while she was pregnant with me."

"No, my dog didn't eat my homework. He piddled on it. Do you still want it?"