Homework Excuse Enthusiast Pillows

'The dog kinda ate my homework. He deleted it off my hard drive.'

"The Cloud ate my homework ... "

'I'm not allowed to have a dog, so I have to eat my own homework.'

'Spit that homework out right now! You'll spoil your appetite.'

'That's right, my dog DID eat my homework.'

"Pfff, eating homework is nothing! My mum eats the clothes off the clothes line..."

"My dog ate your homework."

'But I did study. I guess the software didn't install successfully.'

"Dammit, Higgins, we don't need simple explanations, we need complicated excuses!"

Bob tries to get off on a technicality.

"I'm good enough at making excuses that I don't have to be good at anything else!"

'A cyber-terrorist stole my homework. I have a note from the CIA. '

Billy strip: help with homework.

"My dog ate my homework. Then the backup files were hacked by Russians."

'There's a Mr Tilbin here to see you sir. Shall I tell him you're on the phone, in a meeting, or out of the office?'

Homework Help and Homework Eaten Stands

Of course I've not dusted - You know I favour a matt finish!'

"A catfish ate my homework."

'Your homework got washed away with your house! A likely story young man! See me after class!'

"My dad ate my homework."

"For your information, officer, I was not ‘texting’ – I was reviewing candidate applications for fellowship grants!"

"I'm not doodling. I'm illuminating my homework."

'Boy, am I hungry. Alll I've had to eat today is some homework!'

'Sorry I'm late. I woke up on my back, and you know how turtles are.'

"I can't help the fact he's fallen in love with the barmaids poodle."

"I'm all out of answers! Get me my book of excuses!"

'Not tonight, Rodney - I have to delete e-mails.'

'...All I can say is, the judge was adamant about his gag order on the case.'

'I tried to do my term paper, but the video store doesn't have ANYTHING about the Spanish-American War!'

The 1 Minute Scape Goat.

"I dictated my essay to my parrot. Unfortunately, my cat then ate my homework."

"I have bad knees."

'An essay on what I did last summer? -- I was hoping to let all that stuff blow over.'

"I put catnip on my homework. I think he'll eat it!"

'What about you, Billy? Did some deranged animal burst in during recess and devour your homework too?'