Homeopathy Fan Gifts

Thin-as-a-ghost super natural foods & supplements.

'Let me through, I'm at Doctor.com.'

What the Doctor Ordered

New Age Store.

'Doctor, how much acupuncture experience DO you have?'

"No, I want to know the meaning of never calling your mother."

'Interesting presentation Bradley, except you were supposed to be discussing the nature of the DOW.'

"I'm sensing a nostalgia for when your mother rubbed butter on them."

'Thyme heals all wounds.'

"I've just overheard the doctor say the farmer has the flu! We all know what that means: chicken soup!"

"When I was a little girl...my mami had really good remedies for our aches and pains."

"Aren't you getting a little carried away with this herbal medicine, Doctor?"

'He touched you and you can walk again? I just got an illegible prescription.'

"It might be time to put you on a stronger anti-inflammatory."

'And so, Ladies and Germs, I conclude that we must promote homeopathy! This may be our best chance to wipe out the human race since the glory days of the Black Plague.'

Acupuncture - "So two hundred needles stuck into my fags will help me quit smoking, will it?"

An unlicensed acupuncturist

Ahh, Chicken Soup

'I've become resistant to antibiotics, but what I dread is a shot of whisky in a cup of hot tea.'

"They say chicken soup is good for a cold."

"Don't tell grandmom about your computer's virus. She'll just tell you to download chicken soup."

Chicken soup is in an intravenous drip.

"My Harvard Medical Guide says if a wisdom tooth is infected, you may need antibiotics and possibly have the tooth pulled by an oral surgeon."

"It's a new way to stretch leftovers. Saw it in Homeopathy Now."

"It's okay. I'm still ranked at the top of my class in self-esteem."

"Here, let me put some ointment on your bug bite. I made it myself from cayenne powder, licorice root and mugwort leaves blended with that vanilla pudding I made last week. Hmm...it's not here."

-"For instance, this gin and tonic does not have a single molecule of gin in it!" -"It's from the staff canteen, right!"

"Oh, here's the problem. He's got a doohickey on his thingamabob."

'I was hoping you could fix it with homeopathy.'

'He says he makes house calls, and he'll be over as soon as he gets his horse back from the blacksmith.'

'I'm trying homeopathcy, what are you trying?' 'Acupuncture!'

'Can you keep a secret? This particular remedy is illegal in 49 states.'

'So, what's this new 'wonder drug'?'

Chicken Soup