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"Would our big tacky objects look good here?"

'Come on, you can help me to choose some lovely wallpaper.'

'Is that the only wallpaper you could find?!'

"This is a clever little shop. It makes you think it would be fun to own a lamp."

"Thanks! Carl put his heart and soul into it, along with, of course, lots of mud and a boatload of his own saliva."

"This is daring, but I like it."

"We went for Scandinavian interiors."

'You're hopeful - worrying about what underwear to wear for the office party!'

At the suit makers

"You love anything tacky, don't you?"

"I went with weirdness over quantity this year."

"What should I wear to the living room today?"

'No no no - that skirt is soooo half past four...'

"Hey, take me home with you! Position me at a slight angle next to the elegant glass soap dispenser in the guest bathroom. It'll look great, you'll see!"

Doulton Canada Geese

The quarantine self cut.

Choosing What To Wear.

So it's a short back and sides, but leave the horns!

"This will look great on our bedroom wall."

Caveman applying wallpaper cave paintings

Cut out and keep your own Wardrobe Assistant.

'We couldn't agree on the wallpaper.'

Wallpaper Bouguet

"Painted like this, finding furniture to match at least one colour should be simple!"

'Evergreen' my patootie.'

"You know your dog better than I do."

'Nice decorating. I like the clothes and toys everywhere...and the half eaten sandwich really ties it all together!'

"You don't find a style. A style finds you."

Rapunzel's Hair Extensions.

"Reporting live from my apartment in my pajamas, this is Herb Nielson."

'Since we did the make-over I just don't think you fit in any more.'

Which one? The Times? The Post? Maybe The Tribune? Oh, Phil - Picking out a carpet is so difficult.

Trampoline Roller Paint

'We have to talk.'

'We need someone who dresses as badly as you and has an ability to accept criticism...are you interested in the job, jerk?'