Home Safety Fanatic T-Shirts

Security.

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

"You've got termites. The good news is I gave them all little phones to keep their minds off doing any damage."

'It's good to see that you have a smoke detector...'

"Since we installed the video surveillance system we're losing fewer socks."

"I know it looks fine, but let's get an engineer's report and a termite inspection just to be on the safe side."

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"I think he's outgrown the baby gate."

"We've completely child-proofed our home."

'Your father installed a security system.'

"Peter quickly learns the limitations of his new hamster ball."

"Do screen doors just keep insects out, or other things too?"

'Throw it out. . . we never use it, unless you can think of someone that might need it.'

Man carrying crates of eggs about to step on sleeping dog.

Santa hosing the Chimney.

'You can't beat the old style security systems!'

'It even has its own built-in home security system!'

"I just installed a home security monitor."

"Maybe this is insignificant, what with everything going on in the world, but do we have a fire extinguisher?"

"Hurry up and make a wish. Your cake's in there."

'I know the fire's in the kitchen, but that program just irks the hell out of me.'

'New normal' family life

"My dad put in a new security system."

'You said to call back if the gas problem got worse.'

'Nice to have a door opener.'

'Well those stair gates were a complete waste of money'

Beware the Dog

'Is your house baby-proofed?'

'He's always on the heightened alert!'

"Did we turn off the stove?"

'I told you he was smart. He turned a potential hazard into a plaything.'

'I lost him in the house, but don't worry, a snake that big should be easy to find.'

'Let's get some sheep, and don't worry if the shepherd has fire: I'll take care of it...'

"Honey, your radon testing kit is here."