Home Library Curator T-Shirts

'We'll take two sets, for upstairs and downstairs.'

'Hurry, wipe it off before Dad comes home!'

Children's artwork exhibition.

'It's a Joan Biro.'

Misunderstood artist

Shoe addict.

Well, you know these child prodigies - they can be very demanding about how their work is displayed.

'I imagine you'll be asking for a full refund.'

Convenience.

The Rise of Modern Art

Frederic Auguste Bartholdi

"The new house is almost ready!"

Three street vendors sit side by side selling their art; two of the vendors are selling normal paintings while the third is a Neanderthal selling cave paintings.

Board Game Hunter

"There are those who write books to be read and other who write novels for bookshelves."

"You won't believe this but I haven't a thing to wear"

Sold! For £42,000 to the... No wait - it's the wrong way round!

'He knows everything about art. But he doesn't know what he likes.'

Curators at the Louvre Museum would regret approving the installation of a work on a wall behind the Mona Lisa.

"Typical venue, just providing male washroom facilities!"

"Still-Life of New Mexican Grilled Quail with Cilantro and Fennel-Flecked Confit."

"Bootsy has welcomed the vacuum robot into our home in her own unique way."

Leaves falling out of a painting.

"When it's that old, you don't need to add 'A.D.' or 'B.C.'"

"This is one of her more important paintings from her early period."

"Don't you find her work just so wonderfully liberating!"

"It's Chicken Mole!"

'Thank goodness next week we'll be in a new dynasty and we can make some other style of pottery.'

Closed for Renovation

Friends of the Royal Academy - Annual Dinner

"He painted 300 pictures in his lifetime. 1000 of which are in England."

"Hmmm...I wonder what the artist is trying to say...?"

Modern Portrait Gallery

The hall of bad ideas.

"An overload -- even this is beginning to look like Kitsch."