Home Haggler Gifts

'It even has tiny for sale signs on the windows.'

"You just had to book the economy cruise, didn't you?"

'No. . . I'll never spend £400 on a haircut. . .'

'Never accept the first offer, always hold out for more.'

'Dad, I don't need a two-thirds majority to over-ride your veto. I've got mom.'

Young costermonger trying to sell to a gentleman.

Ticket machine costing an arm and a leg.

'A free goldfish with every house you buy!'

How much for a blueberry scone? $3.25. I'll give you $1.20. Huh? $1.40. $1.45. It's not negotiable. Shrewd. $1.65. $2.00. $2.10. $2.25, but I want free shipping! Ebay addicts. $3 for your sandwich. $6.

"The forty thousand dollars includes a rear view mirror!"

"He's refusing to pay the inflationary bits"

"How much if I pedal?"

"Tia Carmen! We're at Plaza Mall...not Flaco's Flea Market!"

The housing market begins to deflate.

"And you thought I couldn't find Hudson River views in your price range."

Man about to pay his hospital bill notices a team of doctors and nurses waiting to resuscitate him.

"Actually, I forgot to subtract the disinterest."

"Apart from the NDA, we have another option before signing a contract."

"All the government wants to do is push our buttons!"

'I flatly refuse to give him fringe benefits before dinner!'

"Our real estate agent is earning his commission since the house sold before he even had put the FOR SALE sign up."

'Look, you still owe us 17 cents.. if you sweep up my office we'll call it even.'

'Damp. What damp?'

'Well, yeah, the hot dog is 10?, but the BUN is $3.40.'

'Are you sure you want to bargain with him?'

'The child's seat is worth more than the car.'

"But I might be interested. How much are you asking?"

'You say that if you sell me it for £50 you'll be giving £100. In that case give £50 and keep it!'

Donald Came Out Of The Recovery Room This Morning But Had To Go Back After Seeing The Bill.

'They're renegotiating their contracts with the team owner during half time.'

'I want a four bedroomed house for under £100,000. Please bring me the 'you'll be lucky' file.'

I lie to my dentist about how often I floss. I also lie about what parts of my body I floss.

'I want to load it on a truck and move it to Oregon.'

"I'll go shop around for a doctor."

"Dad, for Father's Day, I'm giving you $100."