Holy Punsters Pillows

'Apparently so. In the opinion of the Bishop, God would be filthy rich.'

"All we have left is standing room only."

Dogs life

Tequila Mockingbird

"I'll carve the wheels, you'll sell them, and Oog, here, can be customer service."

"After searching for the sun all night, it finally dawned on me..."

'We had an Old Testament skit today. Al Sims was the Hittite, and I was the hittee.'

"We'll just have the loaves and fishes. . ."

"This, Yorik... Do you know him well?"

"...and we hope that, for a cyber-crime, you will consider a cyber-penalty."

'... And as soon as it's discovered, don't play with fire!'

"Look - I've just invented the spade!..."

"Don't be fooled - that's Henrietta, cross-dressing again."

Hamlet.

'Mom, am I my brother's peeper?'

Quick Confessional Box - 8 sins or less.

Sign On Door of Dept. Of Neanderthal Literature - Out Eat Back.

"It's obvious Jesus accepts everyone. His disciples were fishermen, and we know what kind of lies we tell."

"Seats in all parts!"

'And you, William Elwood Hoonavogel, are you willing to give up your free range status?'

'My broker swears it's a great investment but I fear it's just another pyramid scheme.'

Industrial Disputes: the Early Years

"I wish she's take us. She shops at the 99 scent store!"

"Up here, we call it 'Nectar of the Gods' not 'Devil's Brew'!"

-I once dreamed about carrots and peas,and then bet on two horses the next day called carrots and peas. Guess who won? -Who? -An outsider called mixed vegetables.

'Not tonight, dear. I've got a headache.'

"Yes, I know I only caught a lizard - it's called artistic license, Mildred!"

Fart. Le Poot.

Monk at prayer, "and take care, if anything happens to you we're sunk!"

Wash and Let My People Go

"Do you think there might be a bitcoin in it?"