Holiday Humor Seekers Gifts

"Soon, felllas, soon."

"You're gonna be happy to learn your husband's annual overnight disappearances have a perfectly innocent explanation, Mrs. Claus."

"Well, this is clearly a blatant war on Christmas that calls for nothing less than a hysterical and highly irrational response!"

'I love you guys!'

"Well that's just great!! I guess we really are flightless birds now!!"

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

Mrs. Claus has a ladies night out.

Piranhaclaus

Mighty Man Of Justice Goes Christmas Shopping Part 1

Happy Holidays from Sanitary Claus!

'You and your 'Rescue the Reindeer' campaign!'

Elfie Stick

"I prefer to talk to Mrs. Claus. She doesn't care if I'm naughty or nice."

"Why would I want to meet Santa? I can just go home and log onto his social media page from the comfort of my bed."

"I always forget how much louder they sound in the country."

"I can't imagine why we didn't think of this before."

'Dang, again we're going so fast that we caused a disruption in the time-space continuum.'

Evil elves trying to take advantage of Christmas tree fairies.

"How could we be short? You had enough chocolate for everyone on our list!"

"I think I preferred it before he became an equal-opportunity employer."

"I could get used to working remotely."

“He’s timid, very shy. I rescued him from some wacko who tried to steal Christmas.”

How to spot the infrequent Mass attendees.

Father Christmas Painting Robins.

Browned off cows. They can't pull a cracker.

'Looks like no Christmas bonus this year.'

'No sharing gifts! You get the Teddy Bear, he gets the bone.'

Stonehenge Sandcastle

"We can do this the easy way or we can do it the hard way ..."

"All it will do is move crime to the South Pole."

Santa's Helpers

You Will Have a Merry Christmas. . . Resistance is Futile.

Christmas on Other Planets.

"Then you just run a VLOOKUP against the Naughty column."

"Gesundheit!"