Holiday Humor Enthusiasts Gifts

"It starts earlier every year."

Christmas 2020

'It's a seasonal allergy.'

Santa never made it as a pirate: 'Yo ho ho! And a bottle of egg nog!'

"Looks like you're out of options, big man. Sure, I'll guide your sleigh tonight. Here's my price. Cash. And, by the way, we're leaving this out of the song."

"I'm thankful for not being a turkey."

"Just because you can go around the world in one night doesn't mean you can also do your taxes that way!"

Christmas Hat Tree

"Excuse me, did I just hear somebody say 'This is the night of the deer savior's birth'?"

"You got this, gents! Sore today, strong tomorrow! Obstacles are opportunities!"

Reindeer sack race.

'In caes it isn't quite what you wanted,I've kept the receipt...!!!'

Santa Riding Christmas Turkeys

"You should join us for Thanksgiving."

"Any chance one of you might hang around and be our sitter for New Years Eve?"

"Did you hear about the Easter Bunny and Father Christmas getting together so we could have Mother's Day and Father's Day?"

Santa Therapist

"...of course, you can always e-mail your list to my Ho-Ho-Hotmail account..."

"Sure it's in keeping with the holiday. After all, it was a truly religious experience."

'All these adverts for Easter eggs but they never tell us when it is!'

Dreaming of a supplyside Christmas.

'I'm in for breaking and entering.'

'You're seeing someone else, aren't you?'

'Say 'Ho'. . . again 'Ho'. . . again. . . 'Ho'.'

"Yes, Santa, there really is a Virginia!"

Melania's Christmas

"We're going to build a huge wall...between the United States of America, and the North Pole!....And Santa's going to pay for it!"

"Sorry Santa we're over budget for 'meeting the dreams of young children' and we won't have funds for 'screams of delight' until 2026 at the earliest."

"Sellout!"

Rudolph with coronavirus phones in sick.

To Grandmother's House We GO

"Covid's got you busy this holiday season, huh?"

"I'm sorry but I only employ elves..."

"Hold on fellas! It looks they're in need of my expertise."

"I think I know where Blitzen went."