Holiday Giving Gifts

Give to needy atheists and agnostics who have no holiday this time of year.

Give Meaning To Christmas.

"Behold the secret to happiness."

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"I don't know why you always have to choose the same hide-and-go-seek hiding spot that I do, Tommy!"

"As you can see, I've alphabetized the items, presents owing if you will, so if you can digitally initial here, here, here, here and here and sign there. Thank you. See you December 24."

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

'Santa recalled thousands of toys ― he delivered them to kids who're in fact naughty.'

'What's that? It's a leaving present for the next person who comes in late.'

'What do you do with the time you save?'

Christmas Tree

Sana's Back with his soot eating grin.

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

I'm prepared to admit that you may have startled me a bit, sure!

Daughters on the beach

"That'll be five bucks."

'I'd explain how the TV, VCR, DVD, surround sound home entertainment system works...but I don't know.'

"I said I'd give you the world, didn't I?"

"Petting zoo" "Heavy petting zoo"

"I always forget what an expert I am in curling."

"Candy wuld be nice onice in a while."

"Cards to remind people that you still haven’t gotten a thank you note from them"

'Take my tip,sonny and say it with jelly babies.'

"From the gentleman at the end of the barre."

'I told you to invite a friend over.'

The wife whisperer.

"How could we be short? You had enough chocolate for everyone on our list!"

"So last Christmas it was those Cabbage Patch Kids."

"Ooooooh, just what I wanted!"

'They're dog roses!'

Say it with flowers

"I'd like a partridge in a pear tree, 2 turtle doves, 3 French hens, 4 calling birds and 7 swans a swimming."

'You got anything that says I put some thought into this gift?'

Christmas Presents.