Holiday Gifts Gifts

"Who's the new guy?"

'Which' Consumer Testing Whiskies

"I don't know why you always have to choose the same hide-and-go-seek hiding spot that I do, Tommy!"

"I might just get a pie."

LOOSE LOCKDOWN

"Behold the secret to happiness."

Don't forget the hosepipe ban!

'What do you do with the time you save?'

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

Daughters on the beach

"That'll be five bucks."

'I'd explain how the TV, VCR, DVD, surround sound home entertainment system works...but I don't know.'

"I always forget what an expert I am in curling."

"I'd like a partridge in a pear tree, 2 turtle doves, 3 French hens, 4 calling birds and 7 swans a swimming."

"So last Christmas it was those Cabbage Patch Kids."

"No matter what, sleep when the bay sleeps."

"I always end up buying way more black-truffle honey than I intended."

A couple looks at posters of Rio, Paris and Tokyo, all of which feature skyscrapers.

"Not much in the way of loot, but we got a ton of store credit."

'We always like to give more bling for the buck.'

Loopholes

When Tia Carmen says... "It's time to eat healthy!" it means... "I'm only using one stick of butter instead of three."

'Hang on a minute...'

Mouse returns home from work.

Holiday Sales: The Starting Line

"Ticket and passport, please."

'If executive bonuses are outlawed, only outlaws will have bonuses.'

'The whole office is slack-jawed and drooling! It's either a zombie invasion or that smooth jazz you play on the intercom.'

'I had no idea there were so many types of dog treats.'

Snake Charming

"Could you pass me up? I'm in row one."

Cars follow the sign to the mall rather than the sign to the manger.

"Goodnight Tommy, sleeptight, watch the millenium bugs don't bite."

'Moses, you'd better be in that bathtub!!'

"I always know what Harry's going to say, and he always knows what I'm going to say, so, by and large, we just don't bother."