Holiday Food Enthusiast Gifts

"Do these turkeys get any bigger?" "No madam, they're dead."

Night of the Latkes

'All those vegetables Mom's been feeding me finally paid off. I'm a squash.'

'But, Mom. Think of all the leftovers he can thankfully eliminate.'

Panettone

'Thanksgiving's no holiday for turkeys or the women who cook them.'

It's beginning to smell a lot like Christmas

"Anything but milk and cookies."

Rejoice! It's time to celebrate the baby cheeses!

'We can always cook it one half at a time.'

"Pepperoni pizza is my favorite! Ah, Billy, you little suck up!"

The great bit pie chart of holiday season dining.

"Call me selfish if you want, but I have no issue with spoiling the farmer's Christmas lunch: I'm out of here..."

Christmas Drinks 'n' Nibbles System

'Bye dear! I'll have another nice reindeer steak ready for you when you get back.'

Stuffing the turkey.

"When it comes to turkeys, Mom, you sure know your stuff-ing."

'I couldn't find my measuring cups, so I had to kind of wing it with the stuffing.'

'One of my relatives is coming to Thanksgiving dinner...and one of yours.'

"The spare sack? After a million warm beers and pieces of fruit cake...you'd have a spare sack too!"

Happy St Pancakes Day

"Honey, I love celebrating Christmas! I love all the food, the sweets, the Christmas tree and the presents, but our bank account hates Christmas!"

"Our seasonal special is spiced pumpkin apple butternut squash ale. Would you like that in a frosted mug or over ice cream?"

"The holiday roast has yams, petters, carrots, pumpkin, parsnips, and tomato. What shall we call it?"

'That'll be all the mince pies and sherry!'

'After a Gadzillon glasses of milk and cookies who wouldn't have an upset stomach?'

Hot food cafe open every day except Christmas Day.

Turkey Autopsy

Hot Chestnuts

"Cut down on the Ho-Ho's."

Santa's doner kebab - Santa, one of the reindeer has gone missing.

'Don't fill up on milk and cookies.'