Holiday Foodie Gifts

"Man, I am stuffed."

"We met over the holidays."

'For the instant mashed potatoes, the heat and serve puddings, the canned cranberry sauce, the defrost and serve pumpkin pie and the delivered roast turkey, we are truly thankful.'

Pig eating Christmas pudding

I'm taking you off the milk and cookies diet.

'It's too early to start being good for Christmas. I always wait until at least the Thanksgiving left-overs are all gone.'

'Turkey's okay, but most of the trimmings are vegetables.'

Turkey Sandwich anyone?

"I'm afraid I'm going to have to cancel your Thanksgiving."

Christmas Wine

Rejoice! It's time to celebrate the baby cheeses!

"...'Will feed a family of 4 to 6.' What the heck does that mean?"

"Thank you for this food, and protect us from the additives and preservatives therein."

Turkey Decoy

Night of the Latkes

'All those vegetables Mom's been feeding me finally paid off. I'm a squash.'

'But, Mom. Think of all the leftovers he can thankfully eliminate.'

Panettone

Get your no-turkey recipes here! Eco club. Go veggie for T-day! No thanks! I like turkey, sausage, stuffing, creamed onions with bacon and mincemeat pie. I figured as much. How can you tell? Gut check. That's my gut reaction, too.

'Thanksgiving's no holiday for turkeys or the women who cook them.'

It's beginning to smell a lot like Christmas

"Anything but milk and cookies."

'I hope you all like stuffing.'

"Pepperoni pizza is my favorite! Ah, Billy, you little suck up!"

'Bye dear! I'll have another nice reindeer steak ready for you when you get back.'

The great bit pie chart of holiday season dining.

Christmas Drinks 'n' Nibbles System

Twas the week before Christmas and all thru the house

"Call me selfish if you want, but I have no issue with spoiling the farmer's Christmas lunch: I'm out of here..."

'We can always cook it one half at a time.'

Stuffing the turkey.

"I hear you helped make the stuffing. I like raisins."

"When it comes to turkeys, Mom, you sure know your stuff-ing."

'One of my relatives is coming to Thanksgiving dinner...and one of yours.'

'After a Gadzillon glasses of milk and cookies who wouldn't have an upset stomach?'