Hockey Rink Staff Gifts

Yeah, I've been driving in circles for an hour looking for a place to park. Zamboni.

Radar Gun Readings at Baseball Stadium

Happy Hour

'Who gets the decaf?'

'...You push the wrong button, and now, instead of our fans enjoying a fireworks display, we've got an international incident on our hands.'

"Eggshell in omelette make Hulk angry!"

'Lungs, normal. Heart, normal. Kidneys, normal. For the life of me, I can't figure out where your pain is coming... wait. Do you play hockey?'

'Regular or decapitated?'

Please Do Not Throw Cups of Beer At The Players... It's A Waste of Beer.'

"I'll have the prayer breakfast."

'Waiter! -- there's a candidate in my soup!'

Zenboni

"...an excellent fighting lager with just a hint of park bench."

West End Shows closing - box office piled high with boxes.

'His wife is very supportive.'

Chicken Coupe.

"Just a drop."

"Hells Angels, Zamboni Division"

Cook spills food and has to open a can (tin).

'Now, lift and squeeze the diaphragm.' ... 'Sweet.'

'I heard you got a job at that new club. It must be great."

"What?!! I'm reducing friction on the ice."

'I'll have that old breakfast standard, Shih-Tzu-On-a-Shingle.'

The Puck Stops Here.

Reach you goal! Financial Planners Inc. Quality Dentistry. Get you smile back! Anger Management Classes. Downtown clinic. Slipped on ice? Clark Law can get you cash$.

'Me lost, I come in peace.'

'Home-made pie will be quick, I only live 10 minutes from here.'

"Never seen a cow before?"

'Okay, but for future reference; We never grit the ice in here.'

'He's got one more minute alone in the penalty box with my mother.'

Ernie's the person who put the "quiz" in cuisine.

'Watermelon - a fruit to eat, drink and wash your ears with.'

The stilt walkers union on strike

"We think it sort of brightens up the breakfast."

'Self service.' 'How much do I tip myself?'