Historic Humor Seeker Gifts

The Happy Family - Viewing the Menagerie

"If you're tired of stegosaur, go kill something else."

"You're on a what?!"

When laundry ruled the waves.

'Yes, all at once!'

'I was hoping you'd sign them 'To my good buddy Moses!''

"Don't tell me we're eating Paleo again."

Romeo & Juliet & Ron

'On second thought, let's try it the other way around... My head on a lion's body.'

"Bonk!"

'I made your favorite for dinner — pterodactyl nuggets!'

"Nixon was the same way when he first got here."

"I've considered portraiture, but everyone is so ugly."

"Perhaps it wasn't so wise to bring Frosty along!"

"Don't bother gathering carbs for me, I'm on the Paleo diet."

"I should cover your ears.I'm not very good at this.'

"Is it free-range?"

'Do you know what's worse than being a mummy? Being a mummy with prostate!'

Young costermonger trying to sell to a gentleman.

PHARMACY, 'Tell Hippocrates to write his prescriptions in Greek -- I can't read Babylonian!'

"They got me for pillaging. How about you?"

'Gentlemen, invent your engines.'

"Google Earth must have a defective camera. There's a big red spot above our location."

'It's a pterodactyl-house.'

"So who ordered the 'Yo-ho-ho and a bottle of rum on a dead mans chest'?"

The Algonquin Round Table

"Hey Arthur, check it out, a shooting star. That's a sure sign of luck, my friend."

'Yes, the colours are wonderful. But he only does five pages per month, and he doesn't support PostScript.'

"C'mon. Just one more round of funding and I'll build you a horde that'll knock your socks off."

"You ever get the feeling the posse's starting to lose focus?"

'Oh no. The building inspector. He's worse than the Pharaoh.'

The Enemy