High-tech Fan Gifts

"Fill out an application? Can't I just text it?"

Time Machine Collision

"This is my client's videotaped deposition—please be considerate and rewind after viewing."

"Barbara, will you check your texts for a ring emoji?"

"I've had a tip off that someone on the team has been using email."

Really Early Vikings

'Hey...here's a hot prospect...likes catching frisbees, chasing squirrels, rolling in smelly stuff...'

'What do you mean; 'I should burn less fuel to save the environment'? I only discovered fire this morning.'

"Hamlet today"

"Uh, try unplugging him, then plugging him back in."

"Fit watch say me need more steps."

"All I need now is a trainer!"

Man with candle in thought bubble, "Ideas before Edison"

"Hello? JS electrical? It's about this flat screen television I purchased from you."

"It appears you have a virus."

"Factominiums."

'My laptop's being repaired and I felt lost without a screensaver to stare at.'

Fireplace Projector.

'Confusion some years before the invention of the axle.'

'This old VCR warms a mean bagel.'

Smile you're on camera! You're also on my podcast!

'Mr. Wigglerum finally paid his bill but he did it by faxing us cash.'

A man jumps on a pile of papers in the Data Comprestion Unit.

Sugar Machine

'It's all hand made.'

'All I'm saying is that if we don't want to be invaded, we'd be better off with weapons of mass destruction.'

'When I was young I wanted to be a poet, but we couldn't afford a typewriter.'

"He says, 'What hath god wrought...' What should I write back?"

"How am I going to put in a new tape?"

The first recorded e-mail message was launched in the Gobi Desert by Kikitake Suji

'The key to inner peace? A land line.'

"Everyone here is bonding over pictures of their dogs."