Hieroglyphic Decoder Gifts

"A pharaoh who lived by the Nile...And was eaten by an old crocodile."

"What the...They wrapped me in toilet paper!"

Pyramid Handicap Parking

"Writer's block?"

"Is it (eye symbol) before (water symbol) or (water symbol) before (eye symbol)?"

We speak hieroglyphics here.

"This is amazing! Roughly translated, it says 'King Tut was here o.k.'"

'It appears to be a kosher for Passover recipe.'

'This stuff is a snap for me. I used to be a pharmacist.'

'I know what you're thinking.'

"I can write, but I can't draw."

"I'm sorry. . . but I can't understand a symbol you're saying."

"Nice job, but there in the middle, I think you spelled Akhenaten wrong."

Egyptians discussing hieroglyphic spelling.

Hieroglyphic disco dancer

'Will you guys be quiet? These walls are trying to tell me something!'

'Roughly translated it says 'Can't remember the code to get into your pyramid? Call Pharaoh Locksmithing.'

'It says I can't access Pharaoh's tablet unless I'm on his buddies list.'

"I crawl that I may savor the richness and diversity of people and places along the way."

'It says he put the 'Ram' in the 'Rama Lama Ding Dong'.'

"What's a two-dimensional picture for 'rhymes with blinks?'"

"The pharaoh wanted the carvings on that wall."

Lost to antiquity.

'Right there is where he departs from the script.'

'It's this one here, that I don't understand.'

"Oh yes, apparently this one is a copyright symbol."

'Don't be ridiculous, Schaumberg! -- They didn't have Burma-Shave back then!'

"I can't take another memoir."

It says not only was he a kind and benevolent ruler, he was a fun type too.

Ancient Egyptian Curser

'Amazing what a little teamwork can accomplish.'

"This confirms that the Babylonians interfered with the Egyptian elections."

An archaeologist sees an ancient Egyptian entrance to a subway.

'Not THE Rosetta Stone?'

'Remember my son, it's not who you are, but who I was that matters.'