Heavy Sleeper Gifts

"Not me, brother - you wake him!"

"Dad, can you stop snoring?"

Sleeping.

'This one's good if you like to toss and turn all night.'

'Great! The world ended and I slept right through it!'

'Sure I sleep all day. She snores all night.'

Programmer Dreams

"I can sleep late, but, as his agent, I still get ten percent of the worm."

Tarzan, the Heavy Sleeper.

'Since we got this round bed, I've been waking up dizzy every morning!'

'OVERSLEPT? All four thousand of them???'

Bed and Lunch: For People Who Like To Sleep In

"Just two paragraphs from our internet provider's terms and conditions agreement and she was out like a light."

"This alarm clock is guaranteed to wake you. It's sounds like a husband snoring."

"Sorry - is my snoring driving you nuts?"

“I get that the sounds help you sleep, but I don’t like the way he stares.”

Waking the Dead.

'Honey, honey. You've got to stop walking and talking in your sleep!'

'I got rid of those funny little spots in front of my eyes. Now what's bugging me is a buzzing noise in my ears, like somebody sawing logs.'

The Home Birth of Venus

'Get up or I'll send in gramma.'

"Could you stop making that breathing sound?"

'Myself, I'm not a morning person, so I'm definitely not interested in one of those up-at-the-crack-of-dawn types, you know what I mean?'

"He hums in his sleep."

STRIP Hambone: Sleeping employee has sheep on his monitor

'I can't sleep a wink - it feels like someone's got their life savings under here.'

"This next one's for anyone out there who might still be awake."

"It says, 'sorry ... I forgot you're three hours earlier out there'."

"I sleep on my side, but I pass out on my stomach."

'Well, that's it - you can wake up now, it's time for bed!'

"You've got to be kidding. It's freaking noon!!"

"Where's the snooze button on this thing?" "Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow!"