Heavy Sleeper T-Shirts

"Not me, brother - you wake him!"

"Dad, can you stop snoring?"

Sleeping.

'This one's good if you like to toss and turn all night.'

Bed Seasons

I know time is an earthly construct, but I still feel sleepy in the afternoons.

'Great! The world ended and I slept right through it!'

Programmer Dreams

"I can sleep late, but, as his agent, I still get ten percent of the worm."

'Sure I sleep all day. She snores all night.'

'Since we got this round bed, I've been waking up dizzy every morning!'

'OVERSLEPT? All four thousand of them???'

Tarzan, the Heavy Sleeper.

Bed and Lunch: For People Who Like To Sleep In

"Just two paragraphs from our internet provider's terms and conditions agreement and she was out like a light."

"This alarm clock is guaranteed to wake you. It's sounds like a husband snoring."

"Sorry - is my snoring driving you nuts?"

“I get that the sounds help you sleep, but I don’t like the way he stares.”

Waking the Dead.

Sleepless Night with a Mosquito

Doug always circled around four or five times before lying down to sleep.

'Honey, honey. You've got to stop walking and talking in your sleep!'

The Home Birth of Venus

'I got rid of those funny little spots in front of my eyes. Now what's bugging me is a buzzing noise in my ears, like somebody sawing logs.'

'Get up or I'll send in gramma.'

"Could you stop making that breathing sound?"

'Myself, I'm not a morning person, so I'm definitely not interested in one of those up-at-the-crack-of-dawn types, you know what I mean?'

"No! I don't think these are adjustable beds. Why?"

"This next one's for anyone out there who might still be awake."

"He hums in his sleep."

'I can't sleep a wink - it feels like someone's got their life savings under here.'

STRIP Hambone: Sleeping employee has sheep on his monitor

"It says, 'sorry ... I forgot you're three hours earlier out there'."

'Well, that's it - you can wake up now, it's time for bed!'

"You've got to be kidding. It's freaking noon!!"