Heavenly Match Watchers Gifts

God/Saint Watching Football.

'Can't you at least wait until half time?!'

'I wonder what he is thinking about...'

"I've got dominion, I've got dominion..."

Your angel is always with you

A angel wearing a helmet poised to throw a football down from heaven.

Football Angel

"'Smoking' or 'Non-Smoking'?"

"We met in Purgatory, and I think we're going to try to make it work long distance."

Priest sees 'one way' sign point upwards toward heaven.

Tickets. Game Today. Football is not the same up here. Buying a ticket from a scalper won't get you in --- You have to see Saint Peter to get through the gate. Need Ticket. The players literally fly around the field. And all penalties are forgiven. Are there any similarities to the game on earth? Yeah. When the officials review a close play, it takes an eternity!

Inventive Uses of Halo

'Sudden death?'

"Anything's possible if you know the right people."

'I somehow always knew heaven would be like this!'

Rugby heaven

"Ultimate frisbee champ."

'Aim for one of the holes in the ozone layer.'

Basketball player in heaven has a net on his halo that makes it look like a basketball hoop.

'Am I glad to see you.. I'm TIRED of playing Solitaire.'

Heavenly Tennis.

I know, I was expecting something different too...

couldn't you have waited to the final episode of desperate housewives

Golfers' Heaven

'Still polishing it? You're just too good to be true. What do you do with the brownie points up here?'

Golf Sale

'Don't worry -- that's just George Carlin.'

Golfing Gods.

Angel Delight

'I crashed my sportscar on the way to a Golf match.'

"Stop that row!"

'Another hole-in-one. I guess that was predictable.'

"Of course there are golf clubs in Heaven - you'll see for yourself tomorrow..."

'Sorry, but we've never gotten enough golfers here to make it worthwhile to put in a golf course.'

'A wide wide'