Heavenly Entrepreneur Gifts

Angel talking to broker

Profit

"I'm just glad we got out before interest rates went up again."

"You called me, boss?" "Yes, I overheard you talking to patrons about all the new planets we’ve found." "I want you to stop doing that." "At least until I’m done buying up as much of that real estate as I can. I don’t need any competitors driving up the prices." "Very bad man." "When the hipsters run out of cities to gentrify here, my properties on Gliese 581c are going to make a killing."

Money Plant.

"I see you're an ex televangelist who would like to stay in sales."

"I'm trying to achieve total harmony of body, mind, and cash-flow."

"This 'laying up treasures in heaven' thing - Is it some kind of tax dodge or what?"

"Every single day, guys ask you for advice about women, work, sports... Haven't you ever even heard of the law of supply and demand?. . .I'd be glad to steer the downtrodden and the forlorn your way for a mere 82% of the man-to-man-talk fee."

"Tea parties are passé. I'm opening a craft brewery."

"Because of the economic situation they've relaxed the rules."

"The last thing I remember was asking my broker if all my money had been in risk-free bonds."

"Well. . . the cost of living was getting too high, so. . ."

"Eternity isn't so bad - as long as I can keep track of how my earthly investments are doing."

Street person selling bricks from wall he's leaning on.

'Eternity isn't bad, so long as they allow us to day-trade.'

'Of COURSE we appreciate having someone with your expertise in mergers and acquisitions, but offhand I can't think of another corporation that would match up with ours.'

"It has yet to turn a profit."

'Seven companies in three years.'

How to Succeed in Business - Strategy 2: Build relationships at the highest level.

"I wasn't always a big success in business. In fact, I'm still not."

'See, I told you we could cut out the middle men and sell the honey ourselves.'

You called me, boss? Yes. I overheard you talking to patrons about all the new planets we've found. I want you to stop doing that. At least until I'm done buying up as much of that real estate as I can. I don't need any competitors driving up the prices. Very bad man. When the hipsters run out of cities to gentrify here, my properties on Gliese 581c are going to make a killing.

Buy Low and Sell High Gurus

Mulk

… and so, Rudy had become a ground floor investor in Yell, the web site that publishes make-or-break restaurant reviews from a screaming infant. Hence Rudy's invite to the strategic investor meetings. Most of you know me. I'm Tad Johnson, managing partner with Johnson and Steel. Yell! I guess the two questions I hear most: Do we have a viable business model, and what happens when the infant gets old enough to talk or be discerning about food? The answer to both is: Let's hop we all get rich befo

'And what makes you think there's a market for golden eggs?'

"The little match girl realized too late what her mistake had been. She had failed to diversify."

'I'm thinking of starting a religion. What would be a reasonable initial investment?'

"Ya know, Frank. . . we should put an ad in the paper. . . Pete and Frank's trash removal and dispersal service."

"If I ever get my own business, I'm going to practice the Golden Rule."

'I used to think I couldn't serve both God and Mammon, and then I discovered multitasking!'

"Anything's possible if you know the right people."

"Did you know that one-third of all business start-ups were launched by moonlighters working on another company's time?"

'Although you still can't take it with you, they let you follow your old investments online.'