Healthcare Reform Involvement Gifts

'We agreed that your contract was too complicated so we redrafted it to cover your new responsibilities.'

"Everyone at Megadrug is committed to the benefits of spoken therapies, which is why we developed 'nitrazone' to enhance the experience."

"How long were you in the waiting room?"

Doctors Discussion

"Let's use the dog's prescription. His refills are cheaper."

Health Care Crisis table.

So that's it? I've tweeted a risque photo of my bicep. What happens next? We wait for the outpouring. I'm ready. Bring on the outrage. C'mon media! Let's hear your disgust that some old man would brazenly send such a lascivious photo. Then, with the world looking at me, I'll astound them with my idea of a universal health care system! Wait. Wait. Not yet. it's time for my first nap of the day. Can we do this later? What? Zzzzz. Best way for this to end.

'We need people who dream the impossible dreams - like pensions and health care.'

'Make a patriotic decision. Do you want your son to live in a public health insurance tyranny or do you want to let him die as a free American who doesn't have the money to pay for medical treatment?'

Mental Health System Breakdown

Looking for the cause of high health care costs. . .

'We'll see significant savings in health care costs with our new in-house operations.'

'My firm has scrutinised your budget and determined you could save a fortune by sacking us...that'll be £300,000 please!'

"Your arm is broken - so it should fit in well here."

'You want a nurse present? -- Are you discriminating against me because of my gender?'

The Public Option

Uncle Sam and health care.

Day 1: The Launch. . . Starting Day 2: Another Government Bailout.

'I wasn't feeling ill, doctor, until I started hearing about the NHS reforms.'

'I think you misunderstood us...when we said 'no cuts in the NHS' we clearly meant 'catastrophic cuts and savage staff reductions'.'

"...And since the cure is worse than the disease, we can make more money by developing a cure for that!"

'You're clearly not well, just keep taking these until we run out of them.'

'If we can't stand up to the insurance lobby, why would the public think we can stand up against the Taliban?'

Profits for Big Pharma

'You're suffering from a lack of profit-making opportunities within the NHS.'

"Fortunately I hold the patent for the gene that's causing the ringing in your ears, and I can refer you to the doctor who holds the patent for the gene that's causing the pain in your ears."

Annexe 8

"I suspect he might be depressed, let's give him a label and see whether a few years of unemployment and poverty helps his condition!"

'It says...desperately seeking someone to explain the difference between Obamacare and the Affordable Health Care Act...'

'Hmmm ... no health insurance. Take him to the Intensive I Don't Care Unit.'

'The trouble with you doctors is that you don't really understand what the NHS is for.'

McNHS

NHS Suicide Counselling

"But Doctor - will the government pay for Ferris Buelleritis?"

Earth Day / Girth Day