Healthcare Comedy Connoisseur Gifts

"The operation was a success. Thank goodness for YouTube videos!"

'Nurse, why is there always a fly in my ointment?'

Kid with plaster cast being sawn off.

"These are my fish cymbalta, otezla, skyrizi, vraylar and stelara!"

Saline Drip Sommelier.

'Time for your pills.'

"The doctor is in court on Tuesdays and Wednesdays."

There's Nothing Worse Than A Staff Infection

The importance of paying attention in med school.

'Is there a chance you will die under the anaesthetic? Well, that is the killer question.'

"We can give you enough medication to alleviate the pain, but not enough to make it fun."

Robot surgery.

'Hi, I'm Dr.Jones. Sorry about my little prank, but it saves us a fortune in enemas.'

'This could be a very expensive operation — I'm going to refer you to the Federal Government.'

"I'd like to approve a second opinion but your HMO considers that experimental medicine."

"Norton! Put that back at once!"

'It's important to treat all our patients as individuals...this for example is individual number 78/yh5-fg34c.'

'Have you heard about the new Medicare drug plan called plan C? Medicare gives you $30 for a bus ticket to Canada!'

'The Doctor says you can be discharged - so I've brought you a list of jobs you can do when you get home!'

"Let's just start cutting and see what happens."

'I'll give it back to you in a second hon, I just want to get this broccoli out of my teeth.'

'As for the tonsillectomy...there was a little mix-up... In other words, you now have cup size D!'

'Like I said - It's non invasive surgery.'

'I was a junior doctor when I started this shift.'

'You do have catastrophic insurance, but it only applies in case of invasion from outer space.'

'You need some stress.'

Nurse holding giant pill tells patient, 'Relax. It's chewable.'

"I've heard that your medication can grow extra nipples, but I wouldn't worry about that if I were you..."

A medical office filing cabinet has drawer labels that read, 'X-Rays,' 'Lab Work,' and 'Exam Room Banter'

Flu Drugs.

He said he loved her for her brain but was her appendix he was always taking out.

Flyingdoctor's receptionist.

No offense, Doctor, but I'm feeling kinda rushed.

Fish swimming around inside drip.

'Looks like we could have a pandemic on our hands.'