Healthcare Adventurers Gifts

Kid in hospital has I.V. in him that is a straw.

'I checked the database, Mrs. Nimitz. There's no such symptom.'

"When I grow up, I want to go into medicine and help people who can pay out of pocket."

'Almost everything I have hurts and what doesn't hurt doesn't work!'

'What's wrong with me, Doctor?' 'I have no idea! That information comes within doctor-patient confidentiality.'

'I asked if you were affiliated with an HMO not a UFO.'

'Let me guess...it's contagious!'

"I hope you don't mind - I'm training a brand-new assistant and I've asked her to check your blood pressure."

"You only need one prescription. The other 7 are for the side effects."

"As soon as your dentist gets here, we'll begin."

"So you're interested in medicine, public relations, business, contract negotiations and insurance law? Which one will you study in school?"

"I hear he's taking an experimental drug called, 'It Ain't Over Till It's Over.'"

What will the little one be? Epidemiologist? Virologist? PPE manufacturer?

Get well soon!

Healthy Patients Only

An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of insurance forms.

'It's an emergency, Doctor. The vitamin company needs an endorsement.'

Scales

"You call all this a side effect?"

"We're looking for a 5000 step walk."

'It's not my fault that I've developed habits that cannot be sustained.'

Women holding onto birds so that her weight seems lower

'Gastroenterology...do I know that?'

Obese man using a exercise machine. His false teeth are flying out.

"Dear Diary... I've stopped smoking, and I'm sticking to my diet."

Drug vending machines at hospital.

'Thanks for inviting me to dinner - it's really great!'

'There, we're up and running! Let the logging in begin. . .'

Eye, ear, nose, throat & real estate investment trusts.

"I'll bet he takes other dangerous drugs too! See if we can catch him with an aspirin!"

'Doc, my stiches are coming out,'

'Admit it,you've been bothering the nurses again,haven't you?

Exploring Healthcare Careers

'What's this? You're suing me because the prescribed medication made you 'irrationally exuberant' in a down market?'