Health Care Enthusiast Gifts

'Well you're an eye doctor aren't you'

'First we'll do a whole series of tests. With a medical plan as good as yours we're bound to come up with something.'

"This drug is very expensive, but the side effects are worth it."

"They have a medical plan, and a dental plan, but no veterinary plan."

You'll Be Fine If

'Take an aspirin every hour, Mr. Obama, and call me in the morning.'

Hit by a truck trying to dodge Michael Moore!

Obamacare: 'Say ah,ha'

'You'll know this expensive sedative is working when you're no longer anxious about the cost.'

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

'I checked the database, Mrs. Nimitz. There's no such symptom.'

"Things are still a little rough for me, and occasionally I lose hope and get depressed—but I'm getting stronger every day."

Doctor describes inside guts while patient has black thoughts.

"Your contents have shifted."

'I'm ninety-two! Tell me what I'm doing wrong... I dare you!"

"Today we'll be performing some much needed maintenance on Miss Trimbles weak pelvic floor."

"If you'd only come to me sooner I wouldn't have had to go to lunch."

"Your bad cholesterol is trying to persuade your good cholesterol to switch sides."

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

Studies show foods work miracles!

"Can you come back? We're still counting carbs."

"When I grow up, I want to go into medicine and help people who can pay out of pocket."

'It's perfectly normal for middle-aged men to put on a little weight.'

"Can Johnny come out and eat?"

'You need to stay away from the pie in the sky.'

"What do you mean 'sitting is the new smoking'? I thought fat was the new smoking?"

'If you want to live a long time, try not to do anything that will kill you.'

'Your reflexes are still good!'

"You can't compare apples and oranges because oranges have longer legs."

Kid with 'Little Wellness Facilitator' kit

"Daddy, you have to flatten this curve."

'Good news. Your cholesterol has stayed the same, but the research findings have changed.'

'We're all out of flu vaccine - how about something for anxiety...?'

Coming Soon - Maternity Clinic. Coming Soon After - Law Firm Dealing in Medical Malpractice.