Health Regulations Gifts

No Smoking.

Passive Aggressive

'This is Mr. Wilkins, the council's safety officer.'

'If you need any advice or guidance feel free to ask me, I've got a qualification!'

'Do you remember when all we had to worry about was the menu?'

'The health dept. takes a great leap forward.'

"You'll need proof of vaccination, proof of booster vaccination, a current negative test, and furthermore you'll need a notarized certification and. . ."

"We won!"

'Hey! Hey! You need a trout stamp! Where's your trout stamp?!'

'Please leave the light on, dear. I'm afraid there might be OSHA inspectors under the bed.' 'Managers at Night.'

Moses holds up new federal regulation guidelines.

"These are just the guidelines, the forms are in the truck outside!"

"The sign ruins our surprise attack, but it's a big OSHA fine if we don't have it."

'I'm afraid we can't deliver your baby until your CRB check comes through.'

Dr Ed Henderson demonstrates that it IS possible for someone to become too familiar with the safety rules.

How Many It Takes

An astronaut sees a sign saying zoning in force.

'That's our corporate ladder.'

'Oh no. Another major code violation decision.'

'I know you don't belong here, but if we let you go to Heaven, we couldn't not guarantee your safety.'

"UK government aren’t budging boss. Sole supplier or not under the new procurement regulations our new contract has to have three KPIs..."

"According to these latest tests, anything can cause anything."

'I've drawn up a health and safety policy for the company.'

"OSHA is going to hear about this!"

'He's trying to persuade the Inland Revenue that it's a tax haven.'

'You forgot the product label.'

"Uh oh, here come more regulations."

'The health and safety officer isn't happy. He want's you to tie your shoelaces.'

'There's no need for confusion. Part 935 of Mining Regulation 823, Section 323 in Article L clearly states . . . '

'And then the bad man from the Securities and Exchange Commission and I'll huff, and I'll puff, and I'll blow your house down!'

'It's from the Federal Trade Commission -- we have to put in a non-smoking section.'

"These safety goggles are sucking the fun out of the sandbox."

"We can serve a rare handburger, but because of health regulations, this room will have to be heated to 160 degrees."

'Ooops! No got that wrong, those two chemicals should never be mixed...'

"The good news is that your husband will never again ignore the company's safety instructions..."