Health Insurance Expert Gifts

'I'm sorry. It looks like your insurance company doesn't cover pre-existing life.'

Tonight: Al Hari Kish, leading yoga expert, speaks on 'this topsy-turvy world'

"Do you cover hypochondria?"

'Rising health costs are the biggest drain on the economy, so I'll be laying off some of my patients.'

'There, we're up and running! Let the logging in begin. . .'

Trumpcare is buried by the House and Senate while Obamacare remains alive.

'Stop! Don't try to move him until we get his insurance information!'

Androcles, the Lion, and Sid, health insurance auditor.

'Desks equipped with airbags - for now that's our company's health plan.'

'The problem is that you're overmedicated. Luckily there are drugs that can help with that.'

'Everything looks good, Now, we'll just bring in the company psychic to see if you have any pre-existing conditions from a previous life.'

'Before we unload him, he'd like a written price support.'

Medicare: More is Better!

"Be patient, son. Dinner will be served shortly..."

'I'm can't tell if this card from our insurance company is optimistic encouragement or a threat!'

"This is a third-year medical student. To cut costs, your insurance company dismissed the surgeon."

"Well the good news is that according to your insurance there is nothing wrong with you."

'If this warning label on cigarettes packets doesn't stop people smoking, nothing will.'

'Yes we can cure you - but the bigger problem now is: can you afford it?'

Warning: Eating This Food Could Result in a Decrease of Health Benefits

'I recommend a second opinion so the HMO won't second guess me.'

"At this point we're no longer testing you. We're testing your insurance."

Take one Per Day as Affordable.

'I really should have paid more attention to the company's health care coverage options before I accepted a job here.'

'I can't give you a raise, Milhouse, because I'm going broke supplying you with health care.'

'The good news is that you'll be able to continue working and pay my bill.'

"Your prognosis is tied to the outcome of the election."

"Yes, healthcare costs too much in the U.S., but overmedicating patients is expensive."

'Do you want to play doctor?' 'I can't, you're not insured.'

"Why does every disaster movie start with the government ignoring a scientist? Like that would ever happen."

'It's going to take me ten hours to read your care instructions and your insurance only covers an hour of care.'