Health Department Staff Gifts

TRUST: "Are you telling me that none of you knows what it means?"

Now wash your gogs

"Boy, am I glad they finally hired more staff!"

"Now, how can I be of assistance?"

'I really enjoyed my stay in the hospital - I never get served breakfast in bed at home.'

'It's a difficult job, he needed a bigger than average 'stress ball'.'

Surgeon finds a doohickey on the patient's thingamabob.

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

Dancing Doctor

'Before you see any patients have you completed your hand sterilisation and soap management course?'

"Get me this...get me that...fluff my pillow...I don't feel well...if I wanted to listen to that all day, I wouldn't have left my husband!"

"Don't wait up. I'll be working late again tonight."

'and remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

"She fell down stairs again, so this is her third hip."

The operation was going extremely well, but then very unexpectedly, he got trampled.

Covid Variants

'Do I like kids? You bet I do: I deliver babies for a living...'

'Your master isn't due for release until the first of the month.'

Happy Birthday to you.

"He just said his first word!"

'He's our new Bone Specialist!'

Coronavirus Waves

'We tend to favour more traditional anaesthetic techniques here.'

'Sorry, staff shortage.'

Nurse pushing the Grim Reaper out of the Surgery room.

"Nurse, when I asked you to make the patient more comfortable I just meant plump up his pillows!"

"When was the last time anyone checked on Mr Klink."

"This will be a tricky operation."

"I know — but he was nervous and his support dog didn’t seem to mind."

'I do need your bed, Mr. Davies, for me, I'm shattered after working twenty-six hours non stop.'

'Nurse, I said x-ray, not microwave.'

"We've combine the recovery area with the gift shop... just in case your visitors want to pick up a little souvenir."

'I told you not to complain about the hospital food!'

A Hypochondriac's Worst Nightmare

Vaccine Spring