Health-conscious Elder Gifts

Medical Bling: "Help!" on a rope, Important info, O2 4U, Snazzy 3-prong

Man on exercise bike with dog on treadmill

"I never thought turning eighty would be so much fun!"

March Against Big Tech: "Oh, wow, this has bee great for my step count!"

"What do you mean 'sitting is the new smoking'? I thought fat was the new smoking?"

"Everything is dandy--and our intestinal biomes are joyous."

Wash your hands

Running

'Pumpkin pie isn't dessert. It's another vegetable.'

"I didn't ask to be made with seventeen grams of fat."

Old woman with trolley full of medication.

'My mother's resolution is to eat more vegetables, and my resolution is to help her by giving her mine.'

'You've become run down from working too much. Try sneezing on your boss.'

'I'm not feeling well. I think I've got human flu.'

"She was really disappointed when she found out she was going to an eye doctor and not an iDoctor."

Lemonade 5c Sugar Free: 'It sure is!'

Stop smoking,instantly.

'Is it organic?'

Hiker Followed By Paramedic

Spring.

'And also, no cigarettes, no cigars, no alcohol,no sweets,no dairy products, no bacon, no ham...'

'Mr. Franklin. What did I tell you about wheelies in the hallway?'

"...and lay off the energy drinks..."

"It's very important to wash your hooves!"

"Scientists have found out that drinking alcohol can be dangerous...well, water can be dangerous, too!"

'In that case I'll do nothing!'

'I havn't finished last years Marathon yet...'

"I can't eat these nutrition bars. They're for women."

"Spring is in the air but it's December in my ABS."

'My prescription: digital textbooks.'

'No kidding? I didn't realize 80 is the new 20!'