Health And Hygiene Gifts

'Not really the kind of cafe culture we were hoping to find.'

Rat with a suggestion for a messy kitchen.

"Rodent droppings? Hey! We were wondering where they'd got to!"

"Your food will be out as soon as we clean up from the chef's little bout with food poisoning."

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

2021

"Good For You / Bad For You"

"I don't think you're getting enough stress."

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

Self help acupuncture

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

"Do you guys serve beer?"

'You've hit the fitness plateau.'

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

'Let me through, I'm at Doctor.com.'

What the Doctor Ordered

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

"Oh, I like coming to the dentists. It's the only place where people actually ask me to spit!"

Lactose Intolerant

'Well, well, well...'

Mister Mid-Life Crisis

"It's not the social stigma. It's the mercury."

"Four years of dental school only to tell all my patients 'Don't worry about any tooth issues - they'll just fall out and be replaced, anyway'."

"Your contents have shifted."

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

'Not that sort of body building program!'

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

"This prognosis is positive, you've got a cold nose."

'I'm ninety-two! Tell me what I'm doing wrong... I dare you!"

We did a biopsy on the mole we removed, and it turns out it was just an old piece of chocolate.

Express Barber Chair for Chemo Patients