Health And Fitness Buff Gifts

'I'm taking you off of chattering in the outfield.'

Olympic Doping

"Do you mean that the only way I can have a slim body is by having a slim wallet?"

"I hope you are enjoying the walk..."

'It's perfectly normal for middle-aged men to put on a little weight.'

'Of course I stretched first. That's how I hurt myself.'

"Wait! Don't start the chase now: I need to stretch first!:

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

"I hate it when the damned things decide they need to get out and burn off some calories."

Runner collapsing over the finishing line.

'We're looking for athletic people.'

'C'mon, c'mon! I want to be the first one on the stair-climbing machine!'

"It's good you're avoiding radioactive pieces of your destroyed home planet that deprive you of your superpowers... but you should also watch the sodium."

"How long were you in that headstand?"

Woman forcing family to hike through hills.

'He's fine, it's only man flu not swine flu.'

Keep Fit.

'Those fish-oil treatments doing your arthritis any good?'

Humpty Dumpty in Occupational Therapy

Looking at magnetic polarity one understands why an apple a day keeps the doctor away.

Motivation to Keep Fit.

Pollyanna, the Hamster

"When did everybody stop jogging?"

'Hey look I got a free newspaper with my wallchart of north sea molluscs aand DVD of elbow stretching excercises.'

'He's got a good attitude, and he's tall. But he's got to get into the weight room.'

"My diet book is outselling yours."

'Id like to see you in two weeks. Try not to eat during that time.'

"Fit watch say me need more steps."

A doctor calls a body builder to perform a patella tap test on a large patient.

Fitness Course.

"I've just overheard the doctor say the farmer has the flu! We all know what that means: chicken soup!"

"In my workout this morning I hit a new personal best, but on a seasonally adjusted basis, my numbers actually fell."

Weight Gain Denial

So, have you had this 'human flu' yet?

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