Headstand Practitioner Mugs

Shrink Hemorrhoids without Surgery.

"Well, at least we know she died peacefully."

"How long were you in that headstand?"

"The Defendant must stop trying to side-step every question the prosecution asks!"

"When did everybody stop jogging?"

'Well, you heard wrong -- Zen Buddhism doesn't have a Missouri Synod.'

"I warned you about those contortions, Mr. Dershowitz."

"Ok, boy, one more time, then I'd better get this thing back to the battlefield."

'... Of course, once you actually achieve enlightenment, it all gets a bit boring.'

"People are always saying how stupid it is that the bst practitioners are always promoted and make poor managers....but I think that's complete rubbish...He was a lousy practitioner as well!"

Now that we've invented language and bipedalism, we can do stand-up comedy!

The handstand enthusiast with no sense of balance

Wordplay: Inverted.

"All I have is tofu."

Jimmy likes to stand on his head.

As the other boarders stared in awe, Todd blew by them on his new cranio-board.

An attempt at kitchen cabinet stand-up comedy. Dinner is on me tonight!

'You've got some nerve barging in here demanding my staff drop everything and do handstands for you!'

"You father's a nap just waiting to happen."

'My spirit guide told me your inner child really needs a speeding ticket.'

"I wonder what we did in a past life that made us all go bald?"

'I don't have the heart to tell him that electric typewriters aren't REALLY the latest thing.'

'I'm just going to our front gate for a chunner!'

Public Intellectual/Private Intellectual

Konstantin Stanislavsky

Ballet keeps you supple...

Monk applying plasters in the shape of a cross.

Upside down sign offers Yoga Classes.

"I think I've just peaked!"

"Okay, you know so much, you fight him"

Calibrate This

'Could you open the door? I want to see the freezer.'

"I took an online, two-day legal course, so I respectfully disagree with you."

'OK, Mr. Ramsey, it says here that you have terrible pain in both feet when you walk. Well, let's take a look.'

...You should have turned left in corner four.