Haunting Humor Enthusiast Pillows

Soul Food

Ghost School.

'I'm sorry, we don't serve spirits.'

"I hope you don't mind leftovers."

"And this Halloween, try not to make a specter of yourself."

'Frankendumpty'

"Dad, can we please just buy a week wacker?"

'And your class story is an old, old one. In the middle of successful soul-snatching careers you were suddenly bitten by the lawyering bug...'

"Your veins are too narrow. Let me get our in-house specialist to help."

Polterguest: "When is your brother going to leave? He's driving me crazy!"

"It's not so bad! But I DO have to sleep on my side. . .2

'Meet the Ghost Writer.'

"From here on out it's term and conditions."

'We're very lucky, really, with our poltergeist.'

Whaaaah!(Scarey ghost shaped fart).

Sir Gilbert Murgatroyd

'Why are ghosts bad at telling lies?'

Scary Marshmallow Campfire Stories.

"Boy, I get booed everytime I perform here."

'Seriously, Earl, if you say you've got a bone to pick with me one more time, I'm out of here.'

"Is everything ok? You've hardly said 'Boo' all evening."

"As a vegan vampire I suck but I don't swallow."

The next time he sees a squirrel, you take the leash.

'It's not mine.'

'Sorry I can't help, everything is up in the air.'

"It's nothing to be ashamed of. When I was your age I slept with the nightlight on in my coffin, too."

"And, if you don't have an attorney, we have millions of them."

"I wish he'd wait until I'd shot the bloody bird before trying to retrieve it."

'Thank God for periodontal disease. '

Mechanic working on a hearse flees from falling skull

Reasons to be glad you're not a werewolf.

That's some scary SHIT!!

"Got Blood?"

Monster in a T-shirt.

"...An old librarian wearing glasses directed you to the supernatural section?... Well, there was someone fitting your description who worked here once, but..."