Haunted House Humorist Pillows

Rational explanations

'And if you look to your left between the condos and the ABD store, you can see the ocean.'

Don't be fooled by the theatrics. She'll only suck your sap!

One vampire tricks another behind a mirror.

"I'm working from home today."

'Darling - I think it's time to stop feeding the birds.'

"Yeah, I'm moonlighting. It's a living."

"I hope that's low calorie eye of newt."

Dr. Frankenstein creates his newest monster, Frankenmime.

The wooden clothes horse of Troy.

"I feel like tearing of all your clothes and putting them in the washing machine."

Macbeth: Take Two

"Sorry. My blood sugar has just been running a little low lately."

Yard Sale

"And this Halloween, try not to make a specter of yourself."

'Transylvania's most famous Optometrist 'Count Mracula'.'

Job Safety - Pumpkin.

The following is a paid political announcement.

"Johnson, you're new here, right? Mind if I pick your brain?"

'Now that hunting season is over, I'd suggest separate vacations.'

"Well, sir, it looks like things are getting pretty serious for Peter and Pauline."

Cat Frankenstein

'Oh, Olivia, I just love your new caption! Where on earth did you find it?'

"Some Debussy, Igor."

'It's a little varietal I bottle myself...Type A positive.'

'Let's skip Mr. Arnold's house. He's the dog catcher.'

Fancy a pint?

Book: 'From prey to predator in 30 days.'

Estate Agent showing client his parents' house - '...and here's one from our affordable homes range'

"Sometime I feel people go out of their way just to scare me."

"Mom, Dad, this is Kevin, our new ombudsman."