Happy Couple Gifts

Armchair Dancing

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

Cry babies.

'I had my attorney draw this up. It states that if I choose to rise, I don't necessarily have to shine.'

"In lieu of a pre-nup we decided just to label everything."

"This place is one of New York's best-kept secrets."

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

Romance

Couples' therapy

'Come on, you can make it work! You're supposed to be Lovebirds after all...'

"Who told the quartet to play 'Highway to Hell'?"

"Since we're both being honest, I should tell you I have fleas."

"The yellow spotted green bird, eats its body weight in bugs, and mates once every three years."

"What's going on Jen? Why didn't you respond to my kissing emoji?"

His Her Cakes

Dancing in pyjamas

'...honestly I just feel like we don't communicate like we used to!'

'We'd just like to get away from all leading economic indicators for a while.'

"See that stain? My wife did that, not me. All her, totally her fault."

'You may now kick the bride.'

'Ha! Ha! The Wooin' O't!'

You got what you deserve … you deserve each other.

'Why can't he just say 'I do'?'

"... And to this day, she still blames the dog!"

"...And do you promise if you ever should divorce that you'll remain friends?"

"... Oh, don't worry, I won't 'overcook it'... I hope you like, sushi."

'Al, that hopeless romantic, sends me love letters written in wine. I just wish he'd use red instead of white.'

'Your pediatrician? No. . . I'm your baby's college admissions representatives.'

'We never go anywhere together except here.'

'Why don't you leave the planning of our wedding to me?'

His and Her wardrobe's

Sulk Shows

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.'

Lots of shiny glass objects! Darling, you're spoiling me!

"I knew you were mad when I found nettles in my fig leaf drawer."