Hands-on Humor Enthusiast Pillows

'Construction Lite, 13 less 2 X 4s than our regular construction.'

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

Police Feline Unit

'In its new 'spirit of evenhandedness,' the U. S. Government today sent troops to occupy all foreign countries....'

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

Doctor examining Easter Island statue.

Speed Dating for Turtles

Covid Inquiry / Enquiry

A woman floats in the pool under the shade of an airplane

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

Party of two? No, it was quite a large party.

"Don't flutter your little wings on company time."

Faster, Georges, faster!

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

Do Not Resuscitate

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

Selling lemon latt�

Cariactures

'Cannonball!'

'Actually, accounting is an exact science.'

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

Here and There Trays