Hand Washing Gifts

You really need to be careful about touching your face."

'Mom, why can't I wash my own hands?'

Remember to wash your hands: "...but not compulsively."

"Of course it is a nuisance with all this soap, but the important thing is that the germs think so too."

"I wanted to wash my hands but the sign says 'Employees must wash hands.'"

Natural hand soap

Moses separating his Laundry.

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

The Brothers Grime

"My mom programmed my toothbrush to follow me until I use it. It's cruel but effective."

Whack-a-molecule

Hand sanitizer

Shaving

Wash your hands

New Twenty Blades

'I've got it made in the shade. What worries me is sunshine.'

"So long, Ma, I'm ridin' off into the sunset."

'I Love the touch of your dry flakey skin!'

'As pizza maker, maybe a skin care products site isn't the best idea for an affiliate site.'

"No, my mom isn't hosing us down with water to keep us cool. She's hosing us down with sunscreen to keep us from burning."

'Which one of these things is the soap?'

Dermatology: Journal of Itchcraft.

'I would have come to you sooner, but you hadn't graduated from medical school yet.'

'Doctor, how can I prevent wrinkles? Don't sleep in your clothes.'

Team medic spraying deodorant

"The extent of your extracurricular activities in high school, may very well be participation in regular program of oral hygiene using an effective decay preventaative tooth paste, but that won't get you into a good university."

"Believe me, you never looked better since you fell into that vast of skin cream."

"Did you wash your hands?"

'My acne is worst on the dark side.'

"I keep telling them to use sunblock."

"No threat detected. Their vast resources are spent on lasers that combat wrinkles and unwanted hair."

"No, I'm not able to transplant your computer's antivirus software into your body. Try washing your hands more often."

"Worst case of dry scalp ever!"

Wash hand before making sound of one hand clapping.

'Please don't cover me with hot sand, Dear. It makes my skin so oily.'