Hammer Time Aficionado Gifts

"Is it really necessary to shout 'Nailed it!' every time you hammer a nail?"

'Still having a hard time finding day care?'

Cupid and Targets

Award Winning Gardener

The Popularity of Pickleball Inspires a New Wave of Hybrid Sports.

'You're using 14' nails on a 2' door? This is definitely a case where bigger is not better.'

'I love doing things with you, Dad but couldn't you just coach my soccer team?'

Problem Solving

"The white flag means he gives up and will finally hire a professional to finish the renovation."

The Sculptor

DIY horror.

'Bernie always sees the glass as half-full, but not for long.'

'Its your archeries'

"But seriously do you think my eclectic knowledge of the history of the development of the claw hammer makes me more of a sex magnet?"

'My axe is all dull! -- Have you been using it to shave your legs again?'

'When does the improvement phase of this home improvement project begin?'

Pig philosophy class - 'I'm pink, therefore I'm ham'

"Dad needs a Phillips screwdriver. Who's Phillip?"

Grass saying: mow me/feed me/weed me/roll me.

'Face it, William - you're shit at it!'

"Mrs. Barnes is to have a complete head-to-toe – she's to be the victim in a bandage-instruction class."

"Bob's a tool belt."

"Manfred, don't get so defensive!"

The day that William Tell bought his first crossbow.

Servant Painting Targets Around Arrows Shot by a King

William Tell meets Carmen Miranda.

'Any luck with your time machine?' - '.there minute for working it had I thought I but, No'

Bigfoot of Sherwood Forest

'I wonder how my husband is managing at the construction site with my gavel.'

Tea and Sugar Rationing

William Tell in his younger years.

'I think therefore I ham.'

DIY expert.

'Stamp auction' WW2 Victory stamps on two fingers

'HA, HA! See the way arrows are deflected off my brand new breastplate?'